I always thought I was unbothered, but, really, I wasn’t. For the longest time, I used to allow people and circumstances out of my control to have power over me.
I have wasted so much time holding myself hostage for mistakes, allowed anxiety to control my decisions and clung to bitterness towards people that hurt me.
But why? Why was I so bothered by my own failures and what other people think of me?
The truth is, most of us find fault with simple petty things that are out of our control to distract ourselves from our own insecurities.
What Does Unbothered Mean?
Unbothered simply means not experiencing any mental or physical discomfort. Not feeling or showing any worry, agitation, or annoyance. (Source)
When you are unbothered, you live for yourself, you’re happy, and you’re not easily troubled by minor inconvenience.
Are Some People Truly Unbothered By Criticism?
Yes. Some people may have a tough skin and can ignore criticisms. While others let bullshit control their emotions and define their worth.
How To Be Unbothered And Stop Caring What People Think
In this post, we focus on how to be unbothered by people and irrelevant situations in life. To help you become unbothered and start living your life for you. And a list of unbothered quoted.
Unbothered. Moisturized. In my lane. Well-hydrated. Focused. Flourishing.
Cardi B
1| Speak less and listen more
As an introvert, I naturally prefer to listen as opposed to talking. But most people aren’t like that.
Remaining quiet allows you to hear what the other person is saying and avoid miscommunication.
Not to mention, it prevents you from discussing too much of your life with some people who really don’t need to know your business.
This way you keep your life private and they can only speculate.
2| Start your day off right
When you start your day off right, you naturally feel more peaceful and unbothered by small issues.
If you don’t already have a morning routine, then read my miracle morning routine post. It will give you ideas to create your own morning ritual for a peaceful start to your day.
Your morning routine should include rehydrating your body and a moment for personal development.
Notice when you’re off to a terrible start to your day, you become easily irritated and bothered.
In fact, a peaceful morning routine depends on the quality of your sleep. So, make sure you’re in bed on time and up without hitting the snooze button.
3| Be unbothered to protect your energy
Not everyone you love and care for wants the best for you. Even some of your closest friends and family can be envious of your lifestyle and want to see you stumble and fall.
Most negative people have nothing better to do than to gossip and criticize others. So, know the quality of your friends and when to cut people off.
Because, before you know it, negativity will corrupt your mind. Since you’re the sum of the people you surround yourself with.
Remember, your thoughts and feelings create your reality. So, creating a positive, fulfilling life means being surrounded by positive people.
4| It’s not always about you
One of the worst things to do is to take criticism too seriously, especially if it is from people you don’t know, or those so call friends.
When it’s coming from people who want the best for you, then it’s ok to consider their opinion.
When people bully, criticize or are just mean towards you, it usually has nothing to do with you. Their criticism is coming from a place of hurt or lack.
Because hurt people hurt other people. And when they are living with insecurities and their life sucks, or they’re just bored, then they have time to find fault with others.
It’s also important to be kind and not respond to hate negatively. Take a moment to consider what they are going through to want to inflict their pain on you.
So, when people try to come at you disrupting your positive energy, respectively let them know you’re not interested or just ignore them.
5| Focus on you & mind your own business
One of the best ways to be unbothered is to focus on you and stop being concerned with how people choose to live their lives.
Sure, it’s easy to compare or have an issue with how people are living their life. Because it’s different or because your life is not what you want it to be.
Don’t become someone who judges other people’s life, live your truth.
From the outside looking in, you can never know what struggles they may have endured to create the life they have.
Stay in your own lane. Don’t waste your energy on other people. Focus on you, get your mind, body, and money right!
When you’re busy living your life, then you have no time to be bothered by others.
6| Learn to deal with issues and move pass it
Another tip to become unbothered is to let go of things that no longer serve you.
One of my biggest problems is holding on to things for too long. Boy, can I hold a grudge!
But it’s a learning process.
I have learned that when life happens and it will, it’s ok to feel anger, pain, and frustration but don’t hold on to it. Or ignore it either. Face it head-on because they are life lessons in every difficulty.
It’s also important to identify your emotions and why you feel the way you do.
Talk to someone if you need to, find stress management techniques that work for you and always find your way back into alignment.
7| Lose expectation
Why do we become so irritated when people don’t live up to our expectations?
If you expect nothing from anyone, then you won’t be disappointed. Simple.
But when you expect people to behave and respond in a certain way, then you leave room to be dissatisfied.
We cannot control others, only how we react to things. So, when you expect someone to be there for you and they aren’t.
Don’t be bothered by it. It’s on you.
8| Choose your battles wisely
Stop wasting energy on useless things. I hate confrontation!
But sometimes it’s necessary in order to speak your truth.
It is also important to be picky with what you become concerned with.
People will always have things to say about you, negative or positive but, it’s up to you to choose what and who gets your energy.
Just be unbothered by negativity!
And not become argumentative whenever people say negative things about you.
Instead, focus your energy on you or more meaningful global issues.
9| Find techniques to destress when you feel irritated
Learning how to be unbothered requires having techniques to destress whenever issues arise.
After all, we’re all humans and it’s impossible to be completely unbothered all the time.
So, when you have effective coping techniques, it makes it easier to filter out what to give your energy to. And helps you return to a state of balance.
10| Reflect before you respond to criticism or hate
The next time you become bothered by anything, ask yourself, is it really worth my time and energy?
Be honest about how you really feel. If you’re angry, feel the anger. Feel what you want to feel in the moment, but don’t let it consume you.
Why do you feel the way you do? Are they triggering some unresolved emotions?
If you feel the need to respond to negative criticisms, wait until you’re calm and never allow others to see that it upset you.
Or that you are allowing them to control your emotions. It gives them power over you.
Having time to destress allows you to respond in a more rational, mature way.
11| Talk to someone you respect and trust
Being unbothered takes practice, but sometimes some of the hate will get to you. And that’s ok!
Talk to someone you trust who can give excellent advice, who is looking out for your best interest and can help you move in the right direction.
Sometimes, it’s just a matter of getting a second opinion to see things clearly.
But be very picky with who you share your issues with, because not everyone wants to see you strive.
12| Fake it till you make it
Even if you’re bothered by a situation or people, don’t let them know. Fake it till you make it. And move confidently in your actions and decisions.
Don’t become reactive and let people think they have some power over you. Be cool in the moment, then reflect on the situation when alone.
Figure out why it got to you. Was there a truth revealed? Did they trigger unresolved emotions?
The point is to act as if you are unbothered to others while you practice how to be truly unbothered.
13| Just be you, Unbothered
Unbothered people don’t apologize for being who they are, they express themselves unapologetically. They are themselves and they don’t apologize for being that way.
We were all created differently, with our own unique personalities. So why are you trying to blend in just because someone thinks you’re weird, fat, skinny, introverted, too quiet, a geek…
No, sis!
Just be your authentic, beautiful self. Let them try to impress you!
Related: How To Stay True To Yourself & Live Life To The Fullest
Unbothered Quotes
Strong women need not declare they can carry all the burdens in life. They just quietly do it and survive with a smile.
Princess Maleiha Bajunaid Candao
I don’t care what you think about me. I don’t think about you at all.
Coco Chanel
Don’t waste words on people who deserve your silence. Sometime the most powerful thing you can do is say nothing at all.
Unknown
Become deaf towards harsh criticism.
Unknown
Me: Unbothered. Moisturized. In my lane. Well-hydrated. Focused. Flourishing.
Cardi B
Queens don’t play in the mud. Don’t waste time responding to negative, unhappy, and unproductive people.
Unknown
There’s something about a woman with a loud mind that sits in silence, smiling knowing she can crush you with the truth.
R.G. Moon
All of humanity’s problems stem from mans inability to sit quietly in a room alone.
Blaise Pascal
Untouched, unbothered standing in my truth untroubled, knowing my authenticity disturbs you.
Unknown
One of the best lessons in life is to master how to remain calm.
Catherine Pulsifer
Being undisturbed by pressure is the real victory.
Lokesh Giri
No where can a man find a quieter or more untroubled retreat that in his own soul.
Marcus Aurelius
Accept yourself you don’t have to prove shit to no one except yourself.
Drake
Am walking away from the toxicity of bothering what people think of me from the impression I made or the conversation I had, I am just walking away from being a girl so fragile to break down on some futile prejudices, and walking towards being a woman leading her life choices.
Aparma
Final Words
Think of people in your life you love fully, without judgment. Always show yourself the same love and respect and stop trying to fit into what people think you should be.
Remain true to you, after all, it’s your journey.
So give no one permission to control your emotions or allow anything to disrupt your vibe.
Become unbothered by haters and their expectations. Live for you and be indifferent to what people think and do what you really want.
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